This narrative non-fiction work tells the story of Beryl Botman as a follow-up on her first publication, With (-out) You (2022) in which she, in conversation with her late husband Russel Botman, reveals how she is experiencing and handling the first year since his sudden death. The following four years are portrayed in this work in the form of letters to her deceased husband.

After a stormy year of adaptation, decision making and change, the following years should be easier. Or is it asking too much? The relationships with stepchildren and in-laws get worse and the chasm deepens. Beryl ensures as far as possible that her decisions and choices are just and rational, especially with regard to a property in the estate. Justice gets a legal twist, going as far as the supreme court, even reaching a tabloid newspaper. She proceeds purposefully with the winding up of her late husband's estate and the memorialisation of his legacy, especially at Stellenbosch University.

The story is divided into four parts, each representing one year after the first anniversary of his passing. She addresses her grief, experiences, feelings and perceptions in the form of letters to the late Russel. Themes of loss, grief and mourning are intertwined with determination, independent decision making and cherishing of that which she and her husband held dear as a couple, as well as creating new experiences and opportunities on her journey as his widow. On her own – her children spreading their wings far and wide – she carves out a new life, creating new possibilities, undertaking new activities, visiting sites of memory and following new roads.